Ribs’ Reviews: Crazy Heart

Jeff Bridges, widely known as “The Cool Guy” from The Big Lebowski or the bald guy from Iron Man, plays Bad Blake, an alcoholic country-music-star-has-been whose days in the spotlight are long since gone and replaced with bowling alley appearances, cheap whiskey and steak dinners in styrofoam containers. (To amplify his bottom-dwelling, we are shown him disposing of a gallon jug of what appears to be his own urine. Which I guess is better than someone else’s.) Somewhere in the Southwest of the USA, Arizona maybe, during his cliché downward spiral, Bad meets a small-time reporter named Jean, played by Maggie Gyllenhaal (Brokeback Mountain’s sister). For whatever reason, because the character development moves faster than Apollo Ohno (watch the Olympics on NBC), Blake falls for Jean like Bisquick® fell for Aunt Jemima®.

This love connection inspires Bad to swallow his pride with a chaser of Pabst® and kick-start his career again with his one-time protegé, Tommy Sweet, played by Colin Farrell (I’m a Douche). The audience doesn’t really know why Bad doesn’t like Tommy but we definitely know that Bad doesn’t like Tommy. Because he says as much. A LOT.

Will Bad return to his glory days? Will he not? Will you care? I suppose you’ll have to see it to find out.

Jeff Bridges gives a riveting performance in Crazy Heart and the Temple of Doom.

It probably sounds like I’m being hard on this movie. That’s because I am. Only due to the fact that there is not a single ounce of creativity throughout the 111 minute runtime. But. I did like Crazy Heart. It follows a timeless formula that never gets old, a formula that seems to work, time and time again. I guess I’m a sucker for it. Also. Jeff Bridges sings in the film better than I have ever seen an actor sing in a film. Even better than Zoe Deschanel in every single movie she has been in. Remember when she sang in The Happening? That seemed pointless. Although, that whole movie seemed pointless. (I hope you agree.) Bridges sings so well, you may even consider buying the soundtrack and not breaking it. The acting is EXCELLENT and award-worthy. Robert Duvall (Every Movie Ever Made) makes a brief appearance, you know, because he is still alive.

This movie receives 3.25 gravy boats out of 5. It doesn’t do much. But what it does do it does well.

If you are looking for originality. Look elsewhere. Remember last year when The Wrestler came out? Well, this year Crazy Heart came out. If you are short on movie ticket cash, you could simply relive your screening of The Wrestler and replace the word “wrestling” with “country music,” then you would have Crazy Heart. There is even a broken, abandoned father-child relationship. Which is always a must. If you have a couple of dollar bills stashed in your jeans, give it a shot.

By the way, internet. Did you see The Hurt Locker? That looks pretty good. Hello? Internet?

Ribs

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